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Causes of fears associated with lack of confidence


   Q. What causes the fears associated with lack of confidence in the shy 
   person?

   A. I can think of the following causes:

     1. Too much concern with what other people think, too much importance 
       being attached to their acceptance and approval; being too sensitive to 
       rejection, refusal, censure and disapproval.

     2. Humiliating experiences in the past that have mortified him and "put 
       him down" --- experiences coming from having personal weaknesses 
       exposed.

     3. Awareness, self-consciousness and fear of certain weaknesses or 
       inabilities that he has that tend to put him into embarrassing, 
       humiliating situations --- situations that put him down and make him 
       look stupid or inept.  Examples of such weaknesses:

          - tendency to panic under pressure (inability to think under 
             pressure, tendency to get rattled)
          - inability to think on your feet
          - lack of quick, ready wit
          - abnormal slowness (slowness in physical movement)
          - mental slowness  (tendency to be a slow learner)
          - tendency to get confused and rattled when someone is trying to 
             explain something to you (especially something somewhat 
             complicated)
          - getting confused and rattled when someone is watching you or 
             looking over your shoulder
          - having a poor memory
          - being unobservant (of surroundings)


   Oct 1977


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